Hiding Grief
by BossaNovaBaby24
Summary: Set after "Emily" season 5 Mulder drops by Scully's apartment the night after the funeral, to check on her. A classic Mulder/Scully moment.


**Authors Note**

**Right well, I'm writing as I go along. All my teachers tell me not to do that, to plan first. But "pfft" to them. Teachers are there to be ignored, and laughed at, and then later swore at because we all got bad grades because we didn't listen.**

**Spoilers : Season 5 "Emily"**

**Disclaimer : I don't own them. I'm going to play around with them, break a few of them, get in a strop with a few of them, then place them back in my toy box until another idea comes to me. **

**Enjoy**

Mulder pulled up outside Scully's apartment.

It had been only a few hours since the funeral, and he had dropped her off earlier. He couldn't sleep, however. Everytime he tried, he saw the image of her in his head. She was standing by the coffin, holding the flowers that he had placed down. She had tears in her eyes, and was reverently touching her necklace. Mulder soon decided that tossing and turning on his sofa was going to be absolutely no help, and so decided to do something constructive.

He slowly unbuckled his seatbelt and looked up at the apartment block. A few floors up, he saw Scully's window. The lights were still on, which worried Mulder slightly. She was still awake, and who knew what she was thinking.

Making up his mind, Mulder stepped out of the car and hurried into the building in front.

Scully stood in the kitchen.

_What was I just doing? _She suddenly asked herself. She held a kettle in her hand, _Oh right, Coffee. Concentrate Dana. _

She admonished herself and poured the boiling water into the cup beside her. A sudden knock at her door caused her hand to reflexively loosen, the kettle in her hand dropping slightly and pouring the scolding water over her arm.

"Damnit." She winced in sudden pain, and placed the kettle hurriedly down. She slowly picked up her gun and made her way to the apartment door.

_You're getting wound up. Calm yourself. _With that thought, she took a slow, deep breath, and put her eye to the door, looking through the peep-hole to see who it was.

Scully sighed in relief as she saw a familiar figure outside, but the relief soon vanished, to be replaced with anger.

"Thinks that I can't manage on my own, does he?" She muttered to herself, before sliding the bolt back, letting Mulder in.

"Hey there Scully." Mulder said, entering the room grinning, "I was driving past, and thought I could do with one of your coffees."

_A poor excuse to check up on me, _Scully rolled her eyes, but she didn't voice her opinions. Instead, she closed the doors silently and went to the kitchen. Mulder seated himself on Scully's sofa. He always found it much more comfortable than his own, and he wondered if she'd be up for swapping hers with his. As soon as the thought entered his head, he laughed, imagining her reaction to the question.

"Something funny Mulder?" Her voice was curt, and she looked at him annoyed, as she set a cup of coffee down in front of her, and sat down next to him.

"No Scully I just- what's that on your arm?" He interrupted his previous sentence, as he saw a bright red patch shining out on her usually pale skin. Scully seemed to have just noticed it aswell, but then remembered her accident.

"A bit of hot water from the kettle." She answered, not elaborating any further. It looked quite painful, but Scully seemed not to notice, or if she did, she didn't show it. _Typical Scully, doesn't care about her own welfare. _

He slowly reached out and pulled her towards him, inspecting the burn. He could feel her wince, without needing to look up, and immediately held it lighter, gently running his fingers around the mark.

"It's going to need some cold water on that." He stated, slowly pushing her arm back towards her. Scully seemed thoughtful for a second, before snapping back to her usual self.

"I know Mulder. I _am_ trained in medicine you know." Her voice was brusque and he was starting to get slightly annoyed at her mood. _Well her 'daughter' did just die_, he thought, looking back at her as she sat staring into his eyes, _so the mood is appropriate_.

"How are you holding up Scully?" He asked softly, catching her off-guard. She seemed to just stare, and he could see a hint of pain within her eyes. As soon as he saw it however, it was gone. Dana had retreated back into her shell. It was Scully who answered;

"I'm fine Mulder."

This time, that phrase did not settle well with Mulder and he refused to drop it.

"Bullshit Scully," He said seriously, holding her gaze, "You are far from fine. And its okay to feel that way. Just tell me."

"Tell you what Mulder!?" She stood up abruptly, to gain a bit of control and power, "Tell you what? I wake up one day to find that I have a daughter! And just weeks later and I've already lost her! How do you _think _I feel!? Can you possibly even begin to imagine what it's like to lose someone you love!?"

Her outburst hurt Mulder. Scully must have noticed, as she sat back down, quietly.

"I know Scully," He whispered softly, bringing his gaze up to hers, "I lost Samantha."

Scully's outward hostility crumpled before his eyes. She moved towards Mulder and placed her arms around him. He held her protectively, and soon after she started to shake.

_She's crying, _He thought to himself, as he placed his cheek against the top of her head, _it's about time._

He continued to hold her, gently rocking back and forth. After a while, her shoulders stopped shaking and he could her shallow breathing against his shoulder.

"I want it to go away Mulder." Her muffled voice was strong against him. He pulled back slightly, and held her face in his hands.

"Scully," He murmured, pulling her hair away from her tearstained cheeks, "Go. You can still do something with your life. Be a doctor, or just another department in the FBI. They're out to hurt us Scully, and if I can protect you by sending you away, then I will."

She sniffed and gave him a watery smile. He grinned back, but dropped it as soon as Scully frowned.

"I can't Mulder," She stated. She slowly stood up, and backed away from the sofa, "I'm part of it now. All of it. If I go now, it won't stop. And I swear to God that I will find those sons of bitches that have put us through this and I'll make them pay."

The promise in her tone stunned Mulder for a second. He regarded her steadily, before standing up with her.

Here was a woman who didn't quit. When death surrounds her, she does not grieve. She just stands up. Brushes herself off, and carries on, with a purpose. In comparison, Mulder felt weak. He was bearing a grudge from years ago, and was still grieving the loss of his sister.

He slowly made his way over to Scully, and pulled her into a hug. They stood there for ages, just clinging to eachother, for protection, warmth and reassurance. Slowly, Mulder pulled away, and his hands on her shoulder. In turn, she placed her arms around his neck, and they stood there, foreheads together, looking into eachothers eyes.

"We'll find them Scully." He gently murmured, regarding her watery eyes.

"I know Mulder, I know." She sighed, smiling back at him.

He moved his hands to cradle her face, and brought his lips to her forehead. He heard Scully sigh contentedly below him, and he planted a light kiss on her forehead, before drawing away.

Dropping all pretence, Scully brought her lips to Mulder's forehead in return. When she moved away, he felt a slight tingle on his forehead, where she had previously kissed.

He brought his hand up to where she had put her lips, and smiled to himself. Scully had moved away now, and was half way to her bedroom. She turned around to Mulder, who still stood dazed in the middle of the living room.

"If you want to stay here for the night Mulder, you're welcome to my sofa. I know its more comfortable than yours." With that, she entered her bedroom and slowly closed her door.

Mulder grinned to himself, settling himself down on her sofa again. _Never misses a trick, that woman. _He thought to himself, pulling a cushion up to his chin. The spot on his forehead was still warm as he closed his eyes and settled down.


End file.
